Thursday, May 9, 2013

Hiding in the Bathroom

Last night I had a mello dramatic confrontation with my tween and a brilliant new idea.

My husband was working late and I found myself seated across from two girls over my usual first dinner of the night of cheese pasta and dark, you-will-eat-it, steamed, veggies. The baby and I noticed that my daughter asked to go to the bathroom twice during dinner and seemed to be eating quickly.

I asked her if she felt alright. Concerned, I remembered that she said her head hurt when she came home. She said she was fine. Seemed normal. In fact my daughter had a sparkle in her eye.

As soon as she finished eating and cleared her plate I asked her to do something and she replied that she needed to go use the bathroom first.

A few minutes later even the baby was suspicious.

We knocked on the bathroom door to find her playing on Instagram with her friends.

She told me that some of her friends moms go in the bathroom to use the phone all the time. They talk about it at school.

She lost her phone rights for a few days.

I may have gained a sanctuary. (Also wish these other moms had shared this tip.)

One of the characteristics of Mothers I have known is not knowing how to ask for help. Or take a moment for themselves.

As a mother with a pain disorder if I don't find a way to prioritize some self care I won't be able to care for them. I need to own this and take time, not have to hide in the bathroom.

I just need to find more time.

I may be writing this blog from my bathroom floor.

Cheers,
ALJ

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